In 2018 I learnt to believe in the power of trusting the journey. Life gets so hard and confusing sometimes. At many points of the year I felt stuck. Trapped in a job I didn’t like, confined to a living situation I wasn’t suited to, stuck accepting things in my personal relationships that I just didn’t want. Trusting the journey is understanding that everything happens for a reason, your next steps might take you to an unfamiliar place. I knew exactly what things needed to change and tried desperately hard to change it. To no avail it felt like at times. Just keep trusting.
I am doing everything I can, at some point things have to break my way.
I am starting 2019 off on an incredible note. I am living in a beautiful house with a group of my closest friends. I have a job that I love, I have finally broken into the communications sector! My relationship is also on the right track. In 2018 I found peace of mind. I had to come to the uncomfortable realisation that I was not in control. My friend sat my down to tell me she had noticed that I wasn’t being myself. I was struggling alone, fighting my battles solo. When you don’t ask for help it becomes you normally convince yourself that you are okay. I’m handling it, I have it all under control. I had to be told that I was in fact doing the opposite – completely shutting down and putting a wall up. This revelation hit me like a ton of bricks. I was down and cut people out for a number of days. However, stepping out of denial was the best thing I could have done. When you are aware that there is a problem you can begin searching for a solution. My solution was to vocalise. Say exactly how I was feeling to the people who needed to hear it the most. Spare no detail, spare no feelings – this was about my sanity and my peace of mind. I had the best night’s sleep once I did this. I know what I want now more than ever. I know what energy I will allow into my life and I am will do anything to keep this peace.
In 2018 I made a plan. I was very sure of the path I wanted to take career wise and I made sure I did. There were many twists and turns along the way, I could have taken a wrong turn multiple times, but I stayed focus. I faced a lot of rejection, some hit me harder than others, but I carried on. It is now 2019 and I am beginning to see the fruits of my labour. The wait and the struggle has all been worth it. Planning has helped me because there is now one notch I can cross of my list.
In 2018 I was inspired. I have been lucky enough to always find myself surrounded by powerful women who know exactly what they want from life. Throughout my biggest wobbles, I forever had strong woman beside me telling me to snap out of it. They would tell me that everything is going to work out great because they see me. They see how hard I am working and how much I wanted things to change. They also weren’t afraid to tell me off when I needed it.
“If you turn up to work late and don’t put in effort how do you expect anyone to take you seriously?!” I have watched women with a lot of determination and ambition for themselves setup amazing careers, projects and relationships. Seeing what they have done made me even more sure of what was possible. Observing these inspirational women pursue their goals made me want to do the same.
In 2019 I want to find some more inner strength. Certain aspects of my life is still a struggle. I want to find the inner strength and courage to truly follow my heart and always do what’s best for me. I know longer want to sacrifice my happiness for others. This will be the year that I really put myself first.
In 2019 I will strive ahead with my plan. It has got me this far but there is so much more I want to accomplish this year. I have a detailed timeline I’ve what I want to happen and when (in my head, maybe I should write it down) and I’m determined to make it happen.
In 2019 I want to make time for people. I’m not the best at making time for my family, often putting my needs before there’s. This year I want to make a real effort to take some quality time out of life to spend with them. My friends, family and boyfriend are my home.
In 2019 I will blog a lot more often! Stay Bliss means a lot to me and I have abandoned it lately. This year I want to post at least once a month. I find myself waiting for ques and ideas before I write. I would like to be able to start writing and see where it takes me!
Overall 2018 has been fantastic! I had some lows and some great highs. I am excited to see what happens in 2019 and I cannot wait to share my experience with you 🙂
Happy new year!